Not in the religious aspect as many might think but from the torment that tends to bombard me on the regular if I don’t put pen to paper or words on my page. I write to continue calmly amongst the chaos that tries to eventuate in my mind on the daily.
I’ll admit that I struggle to find words sometimes that do not sound like alphabet soup or word vomit.
I write for me and anyone else that can understand or relate to my feelings, and the words I’m trying to express. Anyone willing and interested in celebrating the successes of getting it on the page and anyone else who also struggles but shows up anyway.
I write unapologetically.
Thank you Aaron Burden on Unsplash
I write to save my soul from the burning inferno that presents itself in my brain from time to time.
I was told with great shame “Never write anything you don’t want other people to know.” This set me in a panic as a young person. Why must everything be kept secret? The thought of the shame and fear to this day thwarts me and I falter in my writing. As a person with suspected ADHD, the uncertainty of what will happen if I write gouges at my psyche.
Photo by Kaitlyn Baker on Unsplash
I try to talk to myself realistically. “Nothing can happen to you now. You’re only expressing your own feelings and thoughts and experiences. It’s all OK.” I feel by now I shouldn’t need to have these conversations with myself but I think I always will so. I continue - calmly.
Are you like me also and write to find the calm in your mind?
Have you been told to keep things to yourself, never write anything down you wouldn’t want others to know about? Are you writing now?
If you are, I’m so proud of you.
I’m grateful that you have continued and I’d like you to share.
Drop me a line at ivyspencerwright@gmail.com and share your link so I can engage with you too.
I look forward to reading your work.
Ivy, I was only talking to my therapist about this last week because she knows that when I write I feel slightly better about myself and I haven't written - not properly - for a long time and perhaps part of the reason why I haven't is because I have lost my direction (if I ever had one to begin with). This might also hark back to your other post about having or needing purpose in life. And writing about truths is something that is hard right now because of a lot of horrible things that have happened over the last nine months or so and I really wish I could write about it but I worry who might read i…