Yesterday I read a blog post titled, Studio as a verb by Austin Kleon. In light of recent personal events this post hit home for me in several ways.
First, the fastest way to this semi-reformed, semi-southerner’s heart is to use the term “y’all.” It gets my attention. (I know squirrel, right?)
Secondly, it talked about a 31-day challenge. If I know anything about me it’s that I love to rise to the occasion and be...well, successful in that challenge. Can anyone say, dopamine hit?
So, when I woke up this morning, feeling as though, like many times in the past, I’d put my wad of chewing gum on my bedpost that had been full of my ideas, hopes and dreams. Stuck there like ideas collecting like dust in the corner. It felt painful
“Is that helpful?” my groggy mind regurgitated to me words I’d read earlier this week from a book on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. With that decidedly I skipped out of bed grabbing this imagined chewing gum and popped it back in my imaginary mouth.
"A 31-day challenge in writing!" That was my answer!
It’s what would keep the dust bunny of ideas from becoming, well, dusty, stale, stagnant. I assured myself.
But hadn’t I been there before? Hadn’t I rose to the challenge with Camp NaNoWriMo and NaNoWriMo itself many, many times?
I had, but I’d always been the typist, beta reader, editor, publisher and much, much more for others. I’d never participated strictly for myself.
Would I be able to write that much? “Easy as bro, you knocked out 1,667 words a day.” I reassured myself. Would it make sense and be engaging content for others to read? “I’ve got no idea you’re on your own there kid.” my brain laughed. Or would it be word vomit like I’ve been known to produce in the past? “This is possible, you’re going to have to work at it.” my brain lectured.
Picking up book my therapist suggested. The Happiness Trap (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) again, the words on the page seemed again to be very relevant to me.
The author, Russ Harris, discussed how thoughts of “it’s too hard, I’ll make a fool of myself, or I’ll fail.”, are like demons on a boat. These thoughts come to mind on almost everything I do that is outside of my daily routine. (And the well-worn neural pathways in my brain.) If I stay out at sea the demons stay put in the bow of the boat and leave me feeling...comfortable. (The comfort zone)
If at first you might be like me and think, “well yeah, that’s OK.” Then you begin to see how much bullshit your brain seems to be willing to tolerate. It’s not comfortable but horribly miserable.
There you are with your chewing gum full of dusty, crusty ideas stuck to your bed post. Feeling extremely reluctant to put it back in your mouth, not wanting to throw it away but not sure what to do with it. The dreams or ideas always seem to be floating around and are never, ever far away – just within an arm’s reach.
I woke up today being tired of being in “the comfort/misery zone” as Harris discusses. I went on to read that he suggests “keep steering your ship toward the shore"(dreams/ideas/goals). “Furthermore, if you keep sailing toward that shore, you won’t have demons for company; you’ll soon encounter angels and mermaids and dolphins.
And so through the original Austin Kleon blog post I found another called 31-day Practice and Suck Less challenge .
I’m giving it another red-hot go.
What is my 31-Day Challenge?
Journaling 3 pages on A4 paper (Morning Pages) -The mindset behind Julia Cameron’s Morning pages have been grinding my gears of late. According to her and her followers (there are many) it must be 3-pages of longhand writing a on A4 paper. For me it’s simply about showing up on the page and journaling. Offering up whatever the mind must share. But there's a deeper sense in me, that sitting with the journaling, taking my time with it and not making it just another job that I “tick off” will be in my benefit. So 3 pages on A4 paper it is.
Intentional Exercise – 15 minutes a day - I’m a sucker for the lounge/sofa and am known to use any excuse not to move far from my lounge or keyboard. I’ll use this time to develop a better routine like the other routines so engrained in my mind.
Writing about my experience – showing up at my keyboard every day for 31 days, working to improve my writing skills. Sharing how my ADHD mind is coping with the change in my daily routine. Also not scrutinising myself to the nth degree but being accepting to my abilities to write.
This is where the demons scream the loudest. “Yeah, that’s never going to happen!” or “Just another fail!” but I want to meet, mermaids, angels and dolphins.
Do you enjoy a 31-day, 60-day or 100-day challenge too? Will you come along and support me in this attempt to suck less? Maybe even have a 31-day challenge yourself?
I’d love to hear your thoughts and what you’re embracing in the comments below.
Love,
P.S. If you are keen to follow a long you can find a calendar here on Kleon’s site. I’ll be be starting on the 4th day and adding 4 days at the end so I can keep my days straight in my brain. The predicted final day of the 31-day challenge - August 4th, 2023.
Comments